Everything looks different at night. I had a moment of illumination at a dark hour.
Hi my name is Milly and I still have a lot of pride and I have many things yet to learn but it came as a surprise in this moment because I have always been so reflective, so humble, so……. whatever!!! The point is sometimes we can get so wrapped up in the way we do things (or think that we do) that we fail to see what’s really happening before our eyes. I am now so independent!! (I am recovering from a form of Codependency )
This is what I tell myself you’re pretty neat Milly you can drive wherever you want, go where you need to go, you can go the distance all on your own. You’re a lone ranger *when you need to be*, you can think deeply on many a subject as you glide over the roads from one end of the island to the next because the desire of your heart is now “Jesus” right? even at night!
Yes my desire is Jesus I am desperate for Him no doubts about this, but I realized something, I have been fueling my own irresponsibility (A codependent to self?). In my attempt to get home on this particular night I realised I am forever and always will be dependent .. dependent on what or who ? On God, his protection, his guidance, outpouring of wisdom, his will, glory and saving grace!!! I could put on my silly little app and feel I will get where I need to go, no. Take dirt!!!
The fact is, this may well have been a route but a road that was not for me, a road that would lead to oblivion,where nobody would see me go…lol (I may be overreacting) you just never know…
As I reversed and had an overwhelming realization of my frailty I also was made aware that…
I cannot control everything including how others behave,
I do not know how to change a tire,
If anything were to happen to my car I do not know if I have roadside assistance,
I am not impervious to danger,
God often places the right people into your life for different reasons and at different seasons and when they offer you advice, will you listen when it is offered or will you brush it off and only accept it when you request it ? Be careful who you take counsel from though test everything!!!
“Proverbs 12:15– The way of a fool is right in his own eyes, but a wise man listens to advice.”
Are you doing things with the right motives?
Is your way perhaps the more difficult way?
Things I do know
I do know that God corrects those he loves…
I know that he is always with me…
I know with certainty that prayer over my life has saved me countlessly…to those who pray for me I thank you with my whole heart…please don’t stop (je t’en prie !!!!!)
I know I am continuously going to learn as things are revealed to me…
I know from now on I will make more responsible decisions…
I may be brave but I am also humbled
I am Codependent no more !!!!
I am MEEK and I can be corrected
I am obedient to God and seek the discernment of his voice as such I shall stay alert…
But understand this: If the owner of the house had known at what time of night the thief was coming, he would have kept watch and would not have let his house be broken into.
Revelation 16:15 15 Behold, I am going to come like a thief! Blessed (happy, [a]to be envied) is he who stays awake (alert) and who guards his clothes, so that he may not be naked and [have the shame of being] seen exposed!